Sep 12 2016

A photo posted by Steven F (@sutiibu) on

I’m allergic to huge group rides. I just can’t get into them… I’ve done 5 boro a few times in New York because, well because. But mostly what happens is you move slow as shit until you get to any kind of incline and then the ride stops-you’re stuck with all these knobs who lecture you about different bicycle pet peeves that they have and then the ride starts moving again and you go through a tunnel and they all go “woooooooooooo!” and some people yodel.

This naked bike ride is pretty funny though. Clearly I’m not rolling or spectating but it makes for some funny pictures. My favorite part of it is all the desperate, insecure dudes that roll in it fully dressed to perv out on ladies. It’s a real classy move dudes. But honestly I’m more bothered by the amount of people that roll around standing up doing the BMX pedal balance coasting maneuver and the people that used bikeshare bikes and didn’t cover up the saddles. Gross.

Philly Naked Bike Ride

stand up coasting. creeping dude with clothes on. at least these bike share saddles are covered.

A photo posted by Monkeyman (@chimp_stache) on

This one fool has a bag or something under his ass. Who is in charge of cleaning bike share saddles this morning?

Ride away fast! This green guy is creeping on his bizarre folding Y-Frame bike!

History Report-Mike M from Richmond probably pioneered naked riding in Philly. He used to ride the Philly Messenger races clothless around 1998. He had some Richmond naked fame before he moved here. He carried it over from stagediving at Avail shows sans clothing. Good claim to fame. Avail played at the Wetlands in NYC around 1994 and Mike made a surprise dive. The singer and the dude that just ran around the stage wilding were like “Oh yeah there he is.” Maybe this happened again. IDK. How am I going to remember an avail show in 1994 or 1997 or whenever this stuff happened?

You want to know about an avail show I do remember? They played at the Fake Haus and there was all these girls with shaved heads in attendance.

Sean M says to me “Bald girls are blowing up.”

The End.